The eruption of accusations by supposed victims of sexual misconduct in the past few weeks is a bit discouraging for me, and I am sure there are many other men who feel the same way. Of course, I am guilty of saying and doing things in the past that would be, by todays standards, considered inappropriate and maybe even dead wrong… but I am not that person anymore. I have learned from my mistakes and strengthened those areas of my life where I was weak. Should one person with a grudge, or the desire for a moment in the spotlight, be allowed to destroy all of that work with only an accusation?
I have also been a victim of sexual advances by several women, who not only touched my thighs but my crouch as well, in the hopes of getting a rise out of me. It worked… but fortunately, because of my vow of celibacy, I was able to stop myself from going much further. Should I now name these women, who tried to steal from me my virginity… to embarrass them and maybe destroy their marriages and the lives they have built with someone else?
The mistakes we make in our youth are often shared experiences that become the foundations on which we mature into adulthood. Unfortunately in some of those experiences people get hurt. Hearts are broken, promises unkept, words get spoken that we later regret… but that is Life, and if the results of these mistakes are a moral and just person, should not all who shared in the experience, rejoice?
I do not condone the evil acts of those who set themselves above others. Certainly if crimes of abuse have been proven, punishment is in order, regardless of when it happened… however there must be discernment in determining the extent of that punishment and consideration made for any positive changes that have occurred in the life of the perpetrator.
In my era, ‘to kiss and tell’ was something you did not do… but now that seems no longer the case. Humankind is evolving and with it will come new rules for the way we relate to each other. If things continue as they are, Consent Forms will have to be signed and notarized prior to the first kiss, age will have to be verified and parental permission obtained in writing for anyone under the legal age, and written agreements will need to be made between the two individuals, designating how far each can go while making out. Doesn’t sound all that exciting, but than… I most likely won’t have to worry about it any more anyway.